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Greatest worst thing ever just happened to me, so buckle up folks, it's story time. Girl on a dating app tells me in the first few messages that I'm really cute, which is true, and interesting, also true, and asks me to meet her at 11.40am for a coffee at a random McDonald's. When I ask if she's a 45 year old man trying to harvest my organs, she proceeds to send me 15 pictures in a row that look like they're straight from Facebook, because that's how you convince somebody you're real. Not true. Now, normally I don't accept propositions like this because I'm thinking, what's the catch? Well, I decide to live a little on the Yolo side, and since it's right next to a Subway sandwich shop, I think, what's the worst that can happen? If it is a 45 year old man, I can give him a big hug because I know the feeling of a 25 year old lonely man, get a tasty sandwich, then go home. Apparently that was not the worst thing that could happen. I show up, she shows up, she's real, I'm surprised. I buy her a coffee because I subscribe to traditional gender roles, unless requested otherwise. She uses her McCafe frequent buyers card so she gets the stamps. It's cute. While the guy is making her drink, she tells me to go find a table outside in the sun, so I go outside and find a perfect god damn table because I'm a romantic at heart. Five minutes later, 10 minutes later, 15 minutes later, no girl. I text her the typical guide message, lol, you get lost? No response. Turns out she took the coffee and left. So I'm not saying it's bad to leave a date if you're uncomfortable or aren't attracted to them, it's totally your decision. I don't think that's the case. I think the girl is a zero McCafe dater. And I don't think this was her first time. It was too professional, too clean, it was the perfect McHeist. And I'm starting to think I'm not even mad. She didn't steal my credit card or my organs, just a few euros and my heart.
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