So I have a 16 year old daughter that passed away in a car accident October 19th. I have been collecting a college run for her since she was young. My ex-husband and I both put money into it as well as she put some of her paychecks from work into it and it's about 25,000. I recently got remarried to a man who has a 30 year old daughter. My step-daughter doesn't like me because I'm only 3 years older than her. My husband is significantly older than I am. My daughter was very passionate about the environment and my ex-husband and I discussed what we would do with her college fund. My husband says it was my daughter and I can do whatever I feel is right to honor her. We decided to divide it and we would each donate to charities we felt that would make our daughter proud. My step-daughter however thinks that we should split it evenly and she should get some cushion for buying a house since I'm married to her father and that makes my contribution his money too. She thinks that donating essentially 13,000 dollars wouldn't mean anything to a big charity and I could help someone I know in real life. My husband has since joined her sides and thinks that 13,000 would help her buy a house and we can honor my daughter in another way. Am I the asshole for not wanting to change my plans?