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hey check yourself I don't know I mean I can't always speak for me but I like not a submissive provider I like somebody to match energy like you know we work at things together it doesn't mean we need to be doing the same thing but you know we make up the whole so whatever pieces need to be filled in we do it regardless of gender you know but yeah we make it work I don't know about submissive provider that sounds a little bit taking advantage of somebody