Bro, my ex wants to eat my cat, um, cause I broke up with them because they cheated on me and then they told me that they were going to eat my cat. And they were saying like it's not because they're Asian, it's because I broke up with them, when it's their fault, like they were the one who cheated on me. What the hell am I supposed to do?

Well firstly, you build a bunker for your cat to live in forever. Then you go to the shop and you buy a chicken. You go home, you cook the chicken, and then you arrange the chicken on a plate so it looks like a cat. Then you take it to your ex and you say, here is my cat, you can eat it. Then you won't have a problem because the cat is living in the bunker.

Well, then I guess it's time to look up the best recipes for a cat. I wonder if you sauté it.

Protein is protein.

Girl, call the cops!

Yeah, just let him eat your cat. It's no big deal. You can go get a new one, you know. I'm not trying to be heartless. I think, like, if he eats your cat, you know, maybe you guys can get back together. Don't you think?

Um, so when she said my ex wanted to eat my cat because I broke up with him, I didn't know she was talking about that type of cat. I thought she was talking about the one that's attached to her body. Uh, um, I don't know what to do now. Um, oops.

I honestly think that they're lying when they say that they want to eat your cat not because they're Asian because who the fuck eats cat Who else in the world eats cat? No one

That sounds like a whole lot of bullshit to me. Why you always lyin'?

I think you know what he was talking about, he's not talking about no regular cat, he's talking about-