you know I used to go to b-ball games with my dad back in Delaware in the 60s in the early 70s and he'd say Joey look at those blacks out there do you see those men and I would look at my dad with wide eyes and say dad I can see their dick penises hanging out of their shorts and he'd say that's right Joey look at those big dicks

You know and I'm not bringing up this story because of the black penises I'm bringing it up because my dad believed in b-ball and I believe in b-ball too. Now listen it's really called basketball but it doesn't sound as cool come on man get with the program I mean folks listen

Everyone knows a basket is a basket but if we change the word basket to B and a hyphen and then we say ball after it well then we wouldn't have to use all those unnecessary vowels and consonants that make up the word and we all know what a basket is just say B from now on you know I'm saying B so anyway we're calling them

A basket is a thing that is weaved together by, I don't know, indigenous slaves, and it holds things. Sometimes it holds fruits and berries, and sometimes you can make the weave tight enough where it holds liquids, like water. Or maybe a fruit chutney. Anyway, that's beside the point, B. Uh, B-ball. Um, anyway, it's the truth.

you know a long time ago they had the idea of that perhaps you could be the president yourself based on the I don't know 30 seconds to one minute of sound blurbs that you leave and then they put it through a voice filter and I said dad and he said yeah Joey and I said dad what are you talking about he said don't be a knucklehead listen this is the reason that the deep state murdered JFK

From that point on, I knew I had to become involved with the government somehow. Because if they could kill JFK, well, let me be a Democrat, you know? I'd gladly take that bullet from the grassy knoll for our country. To make a point, right?

Anyway, that's the brain surgery talking. They peeled back my skull and inserted all sorts of new wiring and chips in there. They soldered in my new cortex and now I'm able to process bits at a much higher rate than before. I stream and the torrents are encapsulated by the American people.

I'm just kidding. Let's all shoot a few rounds of b-ball and I'm looking forward to a world where every player looks like Steph Curry Peace out America, that's right