Listen to me right now, Trunks. Tell me why you and your family did a GTA 5 heist on the T grizzly’s diamond-fuckin’-encrusted testicle, my boy, you look like a double-dipped, chocolate chip, cleft-lip, charcoal slim jim with a gargamel nose, a Mr. Crocker hunch back, no fuckin’ feet, nine-arm, seven-stomachs, two ball fades, your stepdad beat you with a whiffle ball bat. You’re curled up into a ball like an autistic bakugan. You live in a sophisticated mud hut, your washing machine is a bucket