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Hezzy the Movie Slayer
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In high school, I was at Disneyland with my brother and my brother's girlfriend and we were coming off Mr. Toad's wild ride. And my brother was like, holy shit, I think that's Quentin Tarantino, who just got in the line for Mr. Toad. So we stood there at the carousel staring at him the entire time he waited in the line for Mr. Toad debating what the fuck we were going to do. Now, he was on a date with a blonde woman and they were sucking face the whole time. It was a pretty short line, so we stood there and waited for him to get off the ride and my brother approached him and he said, hey, you're Quentin Tarantino, right? Mind you, this was probably like 2007. And he says, yes. And my brother says, okay, what was in the suitcase at the end of Pulp Fiction? And Quentin Tarantino goes, you know, I just I get asked this question all the time. I just tell people it's whatever they think it is. And my brother goes like, yeah, but like, I know what it like you're going to tell me, right? I know what it is. It's that guy's soul, right? And Quentin just fucking laugh and he goes, yeah, kid, it's that guy's soul. And my brother was like, I knew it. And me and my brother's girlfriend just rolled our eyes at each other. Like, what the fuck he just said. Anyway, my brother's reaction to that little encounter was that Quentin Tarantino looks even more like a cartoon in real life.
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My ex-boyfriend used to work for a guy who lived next door to Quentin Tarantino and we always used to joke about putting a certain sign on his front lawn. Of course, we never did it, but we thought about it a lot.
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Okay, believe it or not, I'm not that familiar with Quentin Tarantino films. What... what is the sign that you wanted to put on his lawn? Was it, you suck?
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True story I went to elementary school with a kid named Quinn kind of ugly face can we call them Quenton T because his last name was Italian I'm swear to God and I kicked him in the nuts once
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I may have even kicked him in the nuts more than that, because he used to jump me all the time, and once I flipped him over and sent him to the nurse's office, I was a little bit of a toughie. I think I kicked all the dudes in the nuts in my elementary school. Hahahaha!
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Okay, I just found myself googling is Quentin Tarantino Canadian because I thought you were sneakily telling me you went to school with Quentin Tarantino for a second.
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No dude, I've googled the same thing and I did find one thing and I should have kept it that said that he moved with his family for like a year and Quentin was only around for a little while.
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Did I tell you about the time that I met Danny Trejo at Venice Beach and he asked me for a **** of my sandwich? That was funny. I didn't know who it was at first and I just I was scared.
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Did you give him a **** of your sandwich?
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No, because I was not cool enough to know that it was Danny Trejo until after... until afterwards and my boyfriend at the time and friend I was with was like, dude that was Danny Trejo and I was like, wait what?
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You know what? Fuck whether you knew it was him or not. Fuck male celebrities thinking that they can, like, douche- You know, I hate the story about Bill Murray taking some fries off someone's plate and being like, no one's gonna believe you. Okay, so you just take advantage of that fact, you piece of shit?
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I'm glad you didn't let Danny Trejo have a **** because fuck creepy old men asking women for shit, even if they're celebrities.
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You know what? Especially if they're celebrities.
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Fuck yeah dude, that was totally my thought. I was like, I mean, you know, Danny Trejo is kind of a scary looking guy to begin with and I was like 20? Maybe 19? Anyway, I was a little scared, not gonna lie.
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So yeah, creepy older dude and also just like Literally has been to jail and has a scar on his face and so is like it kind of just like a scary That's like who he plays He's play scary dudes.
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I'm sure he's a very lovely and nice man. Uh, but you know, like, he has been to jail, so... Am I crazy for thinking that he was scary? No, I'm not. Because that's how he's literally cast. So, love you, Danny Trejo.
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Quentin actually just bought the Vista in Hollywood. I used to live not very far from it and my friend got married there and he repainted it I think.
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I realized I didn't explain what the Vista was, which is the coolest part about the Vista, which is an old vintage theater from like the 1920s that only has one screen and everything is like art deco and I hope he didn't ruin it. I hope it's okay.
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This is hell of ADHD of me, but speaking of celebrities owning things, I just heard last night on TikTok that Bill Murray owns the freezer in the hotel in which Kenneka Jenkins died and allegedly was murdered. Crazy.
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Yo, what? How... hmm... strange to own a freezer in which somebody has died. Ain't that always the case? It's like Natalie Wood.
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