My parents died when I was younger, so my uncle raised me mostly on his own. When I was younger, he was engaged to a woman, but that was about it. Obviously for a long time I didn't think about it as a kid, but when I got older, I started thinking he might be gay. There's also this guy, John. I don't know him that well, but like he's visited us one to two times a year over the years even though we live on the opposite coast. We usually hang out, all three of us, like at a movie or my uncle will get tickets for something, but he and John will spend time together too. There's just this weird vibe between them. Sometimes I don't know why they're friends because they don't like laugh or talk about the good old days with each other. My uncle is kind of uptight around him. They just seem to talk alone a lot. I've also noticed that when we see my grandparents, my uncle will never be like, oh, my friend John is spending the weekend with us. And this is really embarrassing, but he does this thing where he sends out a little email newsletter to my grandparents and older relatives with like pictures and updates, but I've noticed John is never mentioned there either. The other day I had his phone for something and I noticed a ton of messages between him and John. I didn't see anything but the last few texts, but just noticed the conversation was like really large. But then he saw me looking and took his phone back and didn't say anything. I knew he'd seen it, so I said something like, oh, it's cool that you talk. How do you happen to know each other again? And he gave me a vague answer. I've been thinking about it since that happened and realized I don't even know that much about John. I think he might have a daughter and he's like showed me some of his hobbies, but I don't know anything about like his life or how he knows my uncle. And like it's weird for him to fly 3000 miles multiple times per year to visit in person, right? Would it be weird to say something to my uncle? I feel bad. And even though we live in a liberal area, our family is semi-religious with a lot of older relatives. I feel like I want him to know that I support him specifically. But sometimes people say they're fine with LGBTQ people, but then they don't really mean it. And I know it's his choice, but it also kind of bugs me that he doesn't feel like he can share his own life with me. I'm 17, not seven.

I understand that it may bother you that he doesn't wanna share his life with you I was scared when I came out and I'm way much younger than him it's sad that he doesn't feel like he can come out