Go on the best date because I can just go to the bathroom

Do you know that diarrhea is hereditary yeah it runs when you're a ding yeah ha ha

I'd rather go on the best date of all time because any date that I go on I'm so nervous that I'm already shitting my pants

I'll go on the worst date cuz I really go to McDonald's. I don't care, bro. I don't even care no more Shit, how am I supposed to make dinos for the day?

The worst day that makes for a better story.

If he can't love me after explosive diarrhea, why the fuck would I want him?

Well that's the best day of my life and I have diarrhea then obviously nothing bad's gonna happen if it was the best day of my life like I'll probably just shit at home and shit before I go shit after I go I don't know but I'm not gonna shit on the date if it's gonna be the best of my life