I stepped on glass, that sure was painful as fuck.

I ruptured my eardrum with an earring and I had to go to the hospital

You know when you run up walls and you or like you see people run the walls and then they do a flip I try to do that and I fell on my head

I was really run up my brother so I took off my pants on my diaper and let me tell you right now I was like 5 or 4 but anyways I took off my pants on my diaper and pooped right in front of his door and he stepped in it.

Me and my brothers really thought we was WWE superstars and we're fucking UFC fighters, but no. I broke about like five bones trying to be Jeff Hardy. And my brother broke too trying to be fucking broccoli is there like bitch

I will see you like in the 90s doing dumb shit like taking ride from strangers yeah we didn't really dumb shit when we were kids

I grabbed my teacher's tits. Yep.

Alright, but who the fuck told you to step on glass, my *****?

Motherfucker, that ain't none. I used to eat pennies. I used to thought glass tables were trampolines.

I was on a sled one time during like a snowstorm. I was tied to a golf cart and they were driving and They slung me into a bird pole and I broke my teeth but I got them fixed of course but...

Dumbest the dumbest thing I did as a little kid was think that milk came from regular class a cows chocolate milk come from brown cows and that strawberry milk came from a magical pink cow and some other land