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Bro, imagine procrastinating until you had to ask random strangers on this fucking app for help.
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Uh, imagine procrastinating shaving your mustache till you have an ugly-ass fuckin' mustache. SHAVE IT OFF! SHAVE IT OFF! SHAVE IT OFF!
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Nah, I mean, I don't think that's how shaving works, but okay. You're supposed to grow your facial hair out, not shave it.
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Shit, my bad. I didn't know you had hair on your legs, but um, I don't know if shaving the coochie makes you a whore, but you do you, boo. And I'm a little scared to text that number. Like, part of me wants to just to see what happens, but then another part of me knows that, like, there's probably gonna be a Chinese guy on the other end trying to sell me some Kung Pao.
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