Eh listen, you're embarrassing Scotland mate, see if you could just do us a favour and just delete this app, stop making us look silly in front of the internationals, I'd very much appreciate it like eh, where you fae, let me guess, Edinburgh.

On you go then mate, tell me how I'm embarrassing Scotland cause you sound like you're from Edinburgh cause this is how the Edinburgh people talk so if you're saying let me guess, Edinburgh then Edinburgh must embarrass Scotland even more than Aberdeen cause that's where the fuck I'm from shut your fucking trap Holman

Oh you're fae Aberdeen mate, I've actually never spoke to anybody fae Aberdeen eh, cause it's that much of an absolute laughing stock. I'm leaving fae Edinburgh eh, I was actually just taking the piss, but people fae Edinburgh, at least they're in the discussion mate eh, do you know what I mean, I wonder what they think of people fae Aberdeen, probably the same as people fae Glasgow, I absolutely think it's a shame, shame of Scotland, that's what you are pal. When you run out of your oil, I'm gonna point and laugh at your destructive economy.

I don't know what sort of history you've been looking at with Scotland but it's Glasgow that's a bad area. Edinburgh's known as the capital and it's known as the fucking best area but where all the fuck nuggets come from that's Glasgow. Edinburgh's full of all the poncy ass bitches Aberdeen's just full of the normals

But still, you haven't explained how I'm embarrassing Scotland, you know what I mean, you just speak a heap of shite, most people do, they think they know shit but they don't, so come on, how am I embarrassing Scotland, because I've got a voice and I'm speaking, if you haven't noticed, every country has somebody that will speak out and say shit, and every country will have this quivering little bitch like you, that tells people not to speak out and say shit, or you're embarrassing us, like, everywhere's an embarrassment already with our government, so, shut the fuck up. you

Eh, listen, why are you trying to, like, big up Edinburgh? You already said you're no fae there. The discussion's not between Edinburgh and Aberdeen, it's between Glasgow and Edinburgh, alright? Aberdeen's only known for being the place that people leave out their trip to Scotland. Glasgow, the city where the people make Glasgow, the city where the council need to spend 40 grand a year just trying to remove the cone fae its head, but the people are not having it. We keep putting that cone back in that statue's head. That's what we are known for. What are you known for, eh?

That's awesome. You're known for putting a cone on a statue's head. That's brilliant, like, we've got our own football team and everything, you don't. Like, what do you realistically have, apart from a cone, that you keep putting on top of this head that costs a lot of money to remove? So, you're actually wasting Scotland's money, but you're saying that I'm an embarrassment for Scotland. Like, well done you, well done your people.

And just so you know I actually like the whole of Scotland even Glasgow as I said we're the normals we don't care about either side poor side or low side we're banging in the middle we don't give a fuck so we like all of Scotland really and Edinburgh is a nice place I love the castle and just the place so that's why I big up Edinburgh it doesn't mean that it's the people aren't how I said they were so yeah

Upon a couple of minutes of self-reflection, you should realise that an embarrassment you are, therefore you are an embarrassment. All right, there you go, a little bit of Socrates for you early in the morning. Maybe upon this lack of PowerPoint presentation, you'll realise that it is for you to see and not for me to point out that you are such an embarrassment to our fine country. You know what I mean? You say stuff like, the country's already an embarrassment, I mean, you're embarrassing.

No, I didn't say our country's an embarrassment, I said your city is. That puts a cone on the head and costs us so much money. And thinks that that's not an embarrassment. Okay.