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Hey how you feeling tonight I'm feeling pretty fucking awesome that's my bonus baby in the background talking but I am so that's one of his favorite things in the world but let's get into yucky feelings on the nights I guess you could say episode Your feelings yucky feelings and polyamory let me just say that my personal journey with polyamory began as a child I was born into it and then I got a hold of monogamy after I went to public schools I was homeschooled in a home school district situation Mom and I went to public school in the six grade and until I graduate high school and so that's when I got exposed to monogamy as a construct a way of life RV supposed Norm or whatever so for my journey on my participant side versus my spectator sides of spectator child participant adult so I'm a participant side one of the main things that draws me because I am I am what I like to call poly flexible meaning I can be in a monogamous relationship or I can be in a polyamorous relationship So what I have found partly let me get through away with some of this noise but what I have found is my one of my biggest driving forces when it comes to how I navigate my polyamory power polyamory I navigate my polyamory is I am my lifetime case study
And as my lifetime case study I am constantly observing myself and my triggers and my impulses and things like that and one thing about polyamory versus monogamy there's gonna be things that you will learn about yourself
And polyamory that monogamy would never even put you in the same neighborhood for knowing. You know, to know a learner, what have you. And as a result of my insight.
My incessant need to know about myself I will do all of the digging in my triggers and trying to figure them out and yucky feelings are like the coup de grace
Yucky feelings will take you down. It will take you down through there, but when you when you peel away the layers of the yucky feelings you learn so much more about who you are and why you are who you are and that's my fave.
In addition to want to learn about me I love freedom I don't like anyone trying to tell me what I can I can I do never have never will and will think about if I'm gonna monogamy is I get to be free
And freedom for everyone and ethical monogamy does not look the same a lot of people assume that freedom and ethical non-monogamy or polyamory automatically means you get to fuck a bunch of people and yes you can there are some Purdue
But freedom for me is me being able to love in my full self and with my current partner there is no part of me that is compromise there's no part of me that is left behind I get to love in my full self
One of the biggest things for me is I'm very maternal and my partner has children. So I get to love from a part of myself that I absolutely have to and will feel suffocated if I can.
And that is mothering it's an I am Nashly maternal and I get to express that part myself I'm also a great communicator and he and I have a great communication so I get to have a partner that I can actually community
A part of that I can actually communicate with and a partner that does not see me as a weirdo and who I don't see is a weirdo but we have both been looked at as weirdos and previous partnerships we just get each other and it's not always perfect