My mom would slap me back into my dad's balls, bro.

Nah man, I would've got my arse sent back to fucking Malta, what the fuck. Alright, I guess.

Okay, I'm about to be real serious with y'all, but, um, if that was me, my momma woulda said, I'ma stop you, get out of your fucking place if you talk to me like that one more time, and spill, and spill all that water, yeah, I woulda been dead, honey. I don't know about y'all, but, I don't care if I pulled the last straw, I would be dead. And if I'm, like, if my mom pulled the last straw, I woulda just got mad, but I ain't seen nothing.

Bro, if that was me, my mom would batista bomb me right there in the freaking kitchen, I ain't even joking.

Damn, my mom won't fuckin' kill me. What the fuck? Clean that shit up right now!